[Community] Don’t Be Like Gollum

There’s a chance I will get shot down in flames for this post and I’m sat here weighing up the pros and cons of having my rant and I’ve decided I’m willing to lose the readers that disagree.  

Without further ado here are the points I’d like to discuss:

  • Being pretentious doesn’t improve your skill level
  • Being like Gollum with your knowledge? That sucks!
  • Assuming makes an ass out of you and, well, you!

I’m going to use rope as my example to lay out the reason behind my thinking. Make no mistake though I love rope bondage and I have had some amazing experiences within the rope community and know some truly awesome people who would cite rope as their main kink and passion in life.

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[FemDom Friday] Even Hardcore Kinks Have Low Level Entry Points

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One of the most common reasons people tell me that they don’t feel like they can explore FemDom, even when the desire is there, is because they aren’t into ‘the right things’. Once again porn feeds into some absolutely legitimate and wonderful kinks, but often they portray the more advanced end of the scale.

One of the things I always suspected and was delighted to see it confirmed in Princess Kali’s book ‘Enough to Make You Blush’ is that even hardcore kinks have low level entry points. While I am a huge advocate of every reading her book, I know many of you won’t, so I am exploring my own thoughts on the subject to spread the word. Essentially though, from beginning to end, her book is suitable for everyone. Even those people who deemed humiliation not for them, just like I did. Spoiler Alert: I now love erotic humiliation.

When you first enter the kink community or first start exploring a new side to you kinky repertoire it can be easy to become flustered by some kinks and think that you could never do them. It seems to be a secret that all kinks have low level entry points.

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[Kink] A Switchy Girl’s Guide To … BDSM Roles and Labels

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When you first venture into the kink community, whether that’s by going to a munch or by joining something like Fetlife one of the first questions you are likely to be asked, in form or other, is about how you identify in terms of a BDSM role. For many people the role or label they adopt within the kink community or within their specific dynamic is extremely important to them. It’s not just about BDSM it’s part of their identity as a person and as such it is a wonderful way in which they can express part of who they are.

Then there are people like me, who stumble into the kink scene with a vague idea of what they’re into, assume a label that compliments that and then find after a time that something doesn’t feel right. For me that label was submissive, after all I wanted to be tied up and spanked, what’s not submissive about that? In truth there is plenty about those things that aren’t submissive.

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[Sinful Sunday] Ropes in the Shadows

My image this week isn’t of me, I asked my lovely friend if I could share a photo I took of her this weekend and I am delighted that she said yes.

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[Kink] Is BDSM Curious a Valid Kink?

Masturbation-Monday-badge-1

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The wonderful Posy Churchgate wrote a piece for this week’s Masturbation Monday called ‘Under My Thumb.’ At the end of the piece, which I found to be a very thought provoking read, and while I began to comment on her post directly, I feel that my thoughts might be suited to some of my readers here.

 

Can You Be ‘BDSM Curious’?

“Since joining the kink community which surrounds the Twitter sex bloggers, I have begun to refer to myself as BDSM curious.  I don’t know if it’s an actual ‘thing’ …” – Posy Churchgate

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[FemDom Friday] Be Prepared To Find New Kinks

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This one is actually great advice for anyone exploring kink, fetish and BDSM, regardless of the initial interest that begins their exploration. Without exception every kinky person I have had in depth conversations with about kink has discussed at least one kink they never knew they had or never believed they would be into.

Fledgling Floss: I would never do piss play

FemDom Floss: OMG I sooo want to try piss play

Fledgling Floss: What happened to I would never … ?

FemDom Floss: *shoves a gag in Fledgling Floss’ mouth*

Bringing it back round to FemDom though, a journey many of us embark on in a fairly low key manner. Often with a little hesitation thrown in too due to many of the thoughts I will be addressing in these articles; Will I get it wrong? What if I’m not Dominant enough? What if I’m not a Sadist? These list goes on.

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[Kink] Cuckolding. It’s Not Completely Cuckoo!

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Cuckolding. Is It What You Think It Is?

The dictionary definition of a cuckold is, ‘the husband of an adulteress, often regarded as an object of derision.’ In terms of cuckolding as a kink or Fetish, there is a lot missing from that sentence to get a clear picture of why people enjoy cuckolding with the kink community.

I’m going to start with the term adulteress. Adultery is defined as extramarital sex that is objectionable on the grounds of social, religious, moral or legal grounds. In terms of consensual cuckolding as part of a kink lifestyle, I don’t think many people would identify themselves as an adulterer. While society may class any extramarital sex as adultery, when the sex in question is strengthening or adding to your marriage or long-term relationship, it doesn’t really come under the same category as infidelity.

Continue reading “[Kink] Cuckolding. It’s Not Completely Cuckoo!”